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  • P1: "I will wait with saying mango"
    p2: "Hold off until I can kill you safely without hurting myself"

    p3: "that's gotta earn us some piety points... should make up for us eating that dog"
    p1: "technically we didn't eat it... we fed it to its former owners"

    p1: "Hi gropy-doctor"

    p3: "Show me on the doll where the mango touched you"

    p2: "You've made me shit myself at least fifteen times in the last few days - If you go to the fruit market, I will end you"

    p3: "We throw him back into the elevator"
    ST: "The last you see of him is the woman's hungry eyes on him as the elevator door closes..."

    p2: "I take off my jaw, throw the mango back at him, then leave"
    st: "Do you leave with your jaw off?"
    p2: "No, I put it back on, I'm not uncivilized"

    p3: "I recognized that it was you who got prostituted, not us"



    Malfeas F'Tagn - go check out my epic MLP/Exalted crossover "The Scroll of Exalted ponies" @ Fimfiction

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    • ST:"...or you could spend your downtime burning some xp?"
      P1: "burn things? Why sure"

      p2: "What is the age of concent in the underworld?"
      p3: "Terribly sorry. I'll get right on that"

      ST: "Are the rest of you going to do anything, or will you wait for [p2's character] to do something stupid?"

      p3: "I give [p2's character] my sword - he's my champion, go fight!"
      p2: "I give [p3's character] his sword back, and backhim for his cowardice"
      p3: "oww"

      p3: "I intimidate the ghost with threats of body tequila"

      p3: "Killing zombies is boring, its a chore"
      ST: "Is that because they dont feel pain?"



      Malfeas F'Tagn - go check out my epic MLP/Exalted crossover "The Scroll of Exalted ponies" @ Fimfiction

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      • P1: "I grab one zombie and jam up the rear of the next zombie"

        P1: "i pull the leg off a dead zombie and go over and turn the other zombie into a unicorn. Its creative meat-butchery"
        st: "Somewhere in yu-shan the god of arts and crafts weeps"

        ST: "The ghost turns to you and says 'harder daddy' in response to your clinch"

        P1: "Am I clean now?"
        St: "In body, yes, in soul, not a chance
        P1: "I go out and roll in the mud"

        ST: "YOu could send P2's character's GF a letter telling her wehre to find P2's character"
        p3: "Nah that would be too evil"


        Malfeas F'Tagn - go check out my epic MLP/Exalted crossover "The Scroll of Exalted ponies" @ Fimfiction

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        • "I try to cook and eat this steel mutton"


          Check my Exalted homebrew!

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          • ST: So, can you lot remember what you had planned to do from last session?
            P1: We were going to give [P2's character] a prince albert piercing

            ST: "If you get a charm that gives you an expanding butthole, you can combo that"
            P2: hell of a prison pocket
            p1: like a snake opening its mouth wide open
            st: you can't unhinge your butt
            p2: with practice you can

            p3: "I dont think I'm that austistic right now, I'm only at a 5 - I'm usually at a 7 or 8" (clarity reference)

            p2: not all fights are done with your fists. If you just stand on the mountain and pee on it, you can claim victory over it

            st: you dont want to bathe in liquid glass? why not
            p2: it looks painful
            p1: YOLO!
            Last edited by webkilla; 07-01-2021, 01:48 PM.


            Malfeas F'Tagn - go check out my epic MLP/Exalted crossover "The Scroll of Exalted ponies" @ Fimfiction

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            • P1: We can get her attention if I bite her foot off
              p2: I was thinking we could just say hi and wave an apple at her
              p1: We could throw something at her?

              p3: "You're assuming i'm organized. I just have lots of fruit"

              ST: he might have Int 3
              p3: he's not using it
              p1: I'm just bringing a gift for a host
              p2: you are manhandling one of the king's own soldiers

              p2: I'm not done eating my ice-cream. I deploy my sheild above me.
              p3: I join him, eating ice-cream

              p1: we can be the richest pimps in the south
              ST: Fruit pimps?



              Malfeas F'Tagn - go check out my epic MLP/Exalted crossover "The Scroll of Exalted ponies" @ Fimfiction

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              • P1: “Oh are their bodies at the bottom of the balcony? Like they jumped?”
                NPC1: (snarking): “Wow I can’t believe nobody thought of that.”

                -


                Me: “Wait. You left P1 and P2 ALONE to plan a wedding?!
                P3: “We are not going to listen to any plan they come up with, so yes, I left them alone to plan their fake wedding that ISN’T GONNA HAPPEN.”
                Me: “Sure, WE know not to listen to them but they're still dynasts! Do you think the rest of the city is gonna ignore them?”
                P3: “Yes.”
                Meanwhile, downstairs...

                P1: "Now the first dance is incredibly important... No, put your hand on my ass."

                P2: “Should I put my hand on her ass?” P1: “Only if you’re [My character].”
                P2: “Then no?”
                P1: “Well… actually it might be a good idea to do it in front of her father, ‘stake that claim’.”

                -


                P1: “Fake wedding?”
                Me: “Only if there’s a fake honeymoon.”
                P3 took a swig of wine straight from the bottle.
                P1: “Is it a fake honeymoon if you’re already on vacation?”
                Me: “... You’re not technically wrong but I still wanna punch you.”

                -

                P3: "Does anyone besides me know the Black Crane technique in this city?"
                NPC2: "No. Why?"
                P3: "Because the Anathema knows the style. Which means I'm the only suspect."
                NPC2: "Oh. Well, we just won't tell them, then."

                P3: “I’ve already told them. If they discovered it on their own, it’d be a reason to suspect me, but since I told them willingly it’s not a major concern.”
                NPC2: “... And you made that decision on your own.
                P3: “Yes.”
                NPC2: “*twitch* I SEE.”


                Discord: HalfTangible#7505
                "+3 Girlfriend is totally unoptimized. You are better off with a +1 Keen Witty girlfriend and then appling Greater Magic Make-up to increase her enhancement bonus." -Keld Danar on GitP Forums
                Playing Peleps Raptor, Fire Aspect playboy in the Grand Tour

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                • ST: "You drop off your uncut gems"
                  P1: "Can I drop off my family jewels as well?"
                  ST: "I'm too sober for this"

                  p2: "Yes I'm ready to go, but I had hoped we wouldn't have to bring [p3's character] along"
                  p3: "But I have drugs"
                  p2: "You're in"

                  p2: "How about depression-inducing happy pills?"

                  p1: "So we can use it kidnap children!"
                  p4: "Hold up, that charm doesn't allow storing living things"
                  ST: "Come on people, submodules!"
                  p1: "Hey now that we've broached the topic, we can kidnap people for the brothel!"

                  p1: "I'm a saint"
                  st: "No you're not"
                  p1: "I am pure and innocent"
                  p2: "just no"


                  ST: "What shadowland do you chose to enter the underworld via?"
                  P1: "Can't we just make our own?"
                  p2: "Hold up"

                  ST: "Do you lot even know what you're looking for?"
                  p1: "We'll know it when I lick it"
                  ST: "You don't even know the right magical martial art for that to make sense... and the rest of you lot do not want him to learn that"

                  P3: "Monstrance of celestial portion, sounds like a sextoy"


                  Malfeas F'Tagn - go check out my epic MLP/Exalted crossover "The Scroll of Exalted ponies" @ Fimfiction

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                  • Mind starting another topic and linking back to this one? I don't know what's making the forum keep grinding to a halt.


                    Onyx Path Forum Moderator

                    Plug for the Sword of Creation forum, a new hub for Exalted related content

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