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So this was just posted on Facebook:
Of course it's included as a joke, but i thought I'd go ahead and comment anyway.
Sphere-wise, I don't think it should be this difficult. The Life Requirement is just about right - for ease of use, treating Vampires as Life Patterns seems to be a step in the right direction.The MAtter requirement seems off though. 5? Really? We aren't turning a vampire into anti-matter or neutronium. It's a lawn chair. Now if it's a folding type that's pictured on the Facebook post, that might be Matter 4, as that would require moving parts. If it's a simple plastic chair though, that shouldn't require more than Matter 2.
The bigger question of course is what paradigm allows for turning vampires into furniture, and the answer is likely none. Turn them into stone, turn them into a pillar of salt, turn them into a frog, maybe...no chairs.
Personally I think for transformation magic, the target should get the benefit of lethal soak. HERO system points out that transforming someone is roughly analogous to killing them...a vampire turned into an earthworm is just as little a threat as one turned to ash.
Finally, vampires have a natural tendency to revert back to there prior state every evening, so i think any such effect would have to include some sort of Time, Entropy, or similar effect to suppress that. Otherwise your lawn furniture rises as dusk as the blood-drinking undead, and that is just really inconvenient.
The Notorious Vampiric Lawn-Chair (••••• Life/ ••••• Matter)
A feat more spoken of than actually performed (if only because so few mages have Mastered both Life and Matter well enough to enact such radical transformations of both), this legendary spell transforms a dreaded undead entity into domestic furnishings. Variations include soap-bubbles, trees, household pets, and – in one infamous urban legend – a bag of flaming poo. Despite such rumors, though, the realities involved in this sort of metamorphosis make the idea more theoretical than practical.
According to rumors, both Caeron Mustai and his arch-rival Porthos Fitz-Empress had several pieces of Kindred kindling in their studies, although this seems unlikely, given the risk of said furniture turning back into vampires at inopportune times. Certain vampires have claimed – rightly or wrongly – that mages turned them into chairs and other inanimate objects… typically using that claim to justify the nightmarish fates they inflicted upon those mages afterward. It was speculated that the Massasa Wars were sparked by such disgraceful transformations… and in at least one verified case, that speculation is true. The vengeance worked upon the Hermetic Master in question – who dared to turn a flesh-crafting Tzimisce into a commode – remains an object-lesson for mages with more skill than sense. According to all accounts, he’ll be screaming for a long, long time…
___________________
By popular demand, yes, this rote is in Mage: The Ascension 20th Anniversary Edition.
The Systems, section - which I am not posting here (you'll have to see it when the book comes out) - points out all the things that make this an EXTREMELY difficult spell to cast successfully, along with the hideous results of doing so UNsuccessfully.
Enjoy!
A feat more spoken of than actually performed (if only because so few mages have Mastered both Life and Matter well enough to enact such radical transformations of both), this legendary spell transforms a dreaded undead entity into domestic furnishings. Variations include soap-bubbles, trees, household pets, and – in one infamous urban legend – a bag of flaming poo. Despite such rumors, though, the realities involved in this sort of metamorphosis make the idea more theoretical than practical.
According to rumors, both Caeron Mustai and his arch-rival Porthos Fitz-Empress had several pieces of Kindred kindling in their studies, although this seems unlikely, given the risk of said furniture turning back into vampires at inopportune times. Certain vampires have claimed – rightly or wrongly – that mages turned them into chairs and other inanimate objects… typically using that claim to justify the nightmarish fates they inflicted upon those mages afterward. It was speculated that the Massasa Wars were sparked by such disgraceful transformations… and in at least one verified case, that speculation is true. The vengeance worked upon the Hermetic Master in question – who dared to turn a flesh-crafting Tzimisce into a commode – remains an object-lesson for mages with more skill than sense. According to all accounts, he’ll be screaming for a long, long time…
___________________
By popular demand, yes, this rote is in Mage: The Ascension 20th Anniversary Edition.
The Systems, section - which I am not posting here (you'll have to see it when the book comes out) - points out all the things that make this an EXTREMELY difficult spell to cast successfully, along with the hideous results of doing so UNsuccessfully.
Enjoy!
Sphere-wise, I don't think it should be this difficult. The Life Requirement is just about right - for ease of use, treating Vampires as Life Patterns seems to be a step in the right direction.The MAtter requirement seems off though. 5? Really? We aren't turning a vampire into anti-matter or neutronium. It's a lawn chair. Now if it's a folding type that's pictured on the Facebook post, that might be Matter 4, as that would require moving parts. If it's a simple plastic chair though, that shouldn't require more than Matter 2.
The bigger question of course is what paradigm allows for turning vampires into furniture, and the answer is likely none. Turn them into stone, turn them into a pillar of salt, turn them into a frog, maybe...no chairs.
Personally I think for transformation magic, the target should get the benefit of lethal soak. HERO system points out that transforming someone is roughly analogous to killing them...a vampire turned into an earthworm is just as little a threat as one turned to ash.
Finally, vampires have a natural tendency to revert back to there prior state every evening, so i think any such effect would have to include some sort of Time, Entropy, or similar effect to suppress that. Otherwise your lawn furniture rises as dusk as the blood-drinking undead, and that is just really inconvenient.
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