Legacy: Daughters of Aphrodite

[VenomPuppy]

Hello, I created a Legacy for one of my older PC's, and wanted to get some feedback, since this is my first homebrewed Legacy. In particular, I'm a bit hazy on things like balance on reach effects and such, so would like to know if these are reasonable trade-offs for what you get, since they can be tweaked while still capturing the feel. If anyone else would like to use this Legacy in their games as well, feel free!

Daughters of Aphrodite
Parentage: Thyrsus, Sophros (From homebrew found here: http://forum.theonyxpath.com/forum/main-category/main-forum/the-new-world-of-darkness/mage-the-awakening/883338-the-other-five-paths-2e People on my server have been using it for awhile.)
The Daughters have been for several ages a cult, their exact origins lost somewhere between the burning of old lores and the movements towards monotheism that have made the Greek gods and goddesses a thing of the past. However, even without public worship, the Daughters have plentiful connection to the world, surviving with midwifes, doctors, prostitutes and occasionally even spies.
In its most current incarnation, the Daughters preach all kinds of love, acting as matchmakers, healers of broken familial ties, and beacons among magical communities that keep cabals knit together as ''
Public perception has for a long time been against the Daughters forcing them to hide their origins and be selective in picking new adherents. In recent times this has turned around, as movements supporting LGBT, trans and poly communities have flocked to the Daughters, bringing their own interpretations of womanhood.

Initiation: Gnosis 2, Space 2, Empathy 2 and 2 in one of the following, Athletics, Survival, Persuasion, Expression, Crafts, Occult.
First: Heart Strings
Prerequisites: Initiation
The first training a Daughter goes through is examining the people around her, notating, guessing, and then finally intuiting how a person feels about another at a glance. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Correspondence’ cast at Instant speed and Sensory range.
Optional: Life 1
With a touch, the Daughter can learn about the physical attributes of the subject, emulating ‘Analyze Life’ cast at instant speed. Perhaps because of this Attainment, the Daughters have a reputation for being touch-friendly.
Second: Red String
Prerequisites: Space 2, Empathy 3
Working on behalf of others is a time-honored tradition of the cult, who often find themselves giving guidance, or someone to vent emotion to. By spending a scene with a subject, a Daughter can move sympathetic ties (withstood by connection) between themselves and the subject. This emulates the spell ‘Borrow Threads’ cast at Advanced Duration.
Optional: Life 2
The Daughters have learned that the same qualities that bring them to assist others with their responsibilities, also make others have confidence in them for when they need their help returned in kind. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Lure and Repel’, cast at Advanced Duration. It can only be used on the Daughter herself, or a subject that the Daughter has spent a scene with, per the primary effect, and utilizes the Reach effect to improve social impressions.
Third: Dove’s Sight
Prerequisites: Gnosis 4, One of the Legacy skill at 3, or two Legacy skills at 2.
Often, the Daughters, whether for personal attachments, or on the behalf of those who do not know their beloved’s fate, have reason to pry into the state of a person. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Scrying’, cast Sympathetically. It can only be used with ‘positive’ sympathies, most typically familial or marital bonds, withstood by the connection. Great love makes one’s need to know all the more urgent. Any surface can be used, but most traditionally, one uses a mirror. Some less scrupulous Daughters have been known to abuse this attainment to keep tabs on unwitting crushes.
Optional: Life 3
While sometimes there is nothing a Daughter can do but help a friend grieve, sometimes they see someone on the edge of death. Calling upon the dualistic love that Ares and Aphrodite held, the Daughter can save these people from the brink. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Knit’ with Reach for healing Lethal damage, cast at Instant speed. This can be used on a subject viewed through the primary effect of this attainment, or on a subject the Daughter touches, but they cannot use this attainment on themselves.
Fourth: Call to Atropos
Prerequisites: Gnosis 6, Empathy 4
When all else fails, the senior members of the Legacy must step in to cut the ties of unhealthy attachments. Calling for the death of their love’s fate, the Daughter makes a symbolic call to Atropos to intervene where love has failed. This emulates ‘Cut Threads’ at Instant speed, and as per the spell, these effects are Lasting, but can be reconnected through normal interaction. It is up to the Daughters to convince the subject of the toxicity of the relationship. They can’t force you to learn.
Optional: Life 4
The Daughters have found themselves hunted many times throughout history, needing to hide their appearance, though sometimes this is used to attempt to copy one of the subjects to force an interaction, but for obvious reasons this is discouraged except as a last resort. This emulates the spell ‘Many Faces’ at Instant speed and Advanced Duration. While it is not necessary, the Daughter’s focus on beauty makes many use this to attain the Merit Striking Looks.
Fifth: Cupid’s Arrow
Prerequisites: Gnosis 8, One Legacy skill at 4, and either one more Legacy skill at 3 or two Legacy skills at 2
The ultimate mastery of Aphrodite’s principles is the creation of love. Time spent, and existing feelings are not relevant to the mistresses of the Daughters of Aphrodite. This emulates the spell ‘Create Sympathy’, used after a scene of interaction, wherein the Daughter professes the absolute nature of what they see, their words forming the arrow of myth to strike into the subject’s heart, creating a lasting Sympathy for the named subject, that can only be severed by magic. Some cruel Mistresses of the Legacy in the past have used this to punish people who killed those of the Legacy.
Optional: Life 5
One of the most tragic occurrences of birth and life in a world with conflict is that these gifts can be destroyed, or twisted, babies born with genetic defects, or injuries from war. This emulates the spell ‘Regeneration’, and unlike other uses of this spell, the effects are Lasting, but can only be used to give back the ability to reproduce, or to cancel out birth defects. A ritual of sacrifice is necessary, with the Daughter, or one close to the subject sacrificing a piece of their body to seal the effect, which cannot be itself regenerated.

[proindrakenzol]

First, the lack of real formatting makes this really hard to read, multiple line breaks between paragraphs are your friend.

You're missing some very important sections: most of Origins (you have Parentage, but are missing Nicknames, Background, and Appearance), Doctrine (Prerequisites, Initiation, Organization), Magic (Ruling Arcanum, Yantras/Instruments, Oblations, Theory).

You can also remove the Gnosis requirement, since that's for all Legacy Attainments. However, you should include the Arcanum requirement for the primary Attainment for all but the first Attainment.

Hello, I created a Legacy for one of my older PC's, and wanted to get some feedback, since this is my first homebrewed Legacy. In particular, I'm a bit hazy on things like balance on reach effects and such, so would like to know if these are reasonable trade-offs for what you get, since they can be tweaked while still capturing the feel. If anyone else would like to use this Legacy in their games as well, feel free!

Daughters of Aphrodite
Parentage: Thyrsus, Sophros (From homebrew found here: http://forum.theonyxpath.com/forum/main-category/main-forum/the-new-world-of-darkness/mage-the-awakening/883338-the-other-five-paths-2e People on my server have been using it for awhile.)
The Daughters have been for several ages a cult, their exact origins lost somewhere between the burning of old lores and the movements towards monotheism that have made the Greek gods and goddesses a thing of the past. However, even without public worship, the Daughters have plentiful connection to the world, surviving with midwifes, doctors, prostitutes and occasionally even spies.
In its most current incarnation, the Daughters preach all kinds of love, acting as matchmakers, healers of broken familial ties, and beacons among magical communities that keep cabals knit together as ''
Public perception has for a long time been against the Daughters forcing them to hide their origins and be selective in picking new adherents. In recent times this has turned around, as movements supporting LGBT, trans and poly communities have flocked to the Daughters, bringing their own interpretations of womanhood.

The "T" in "LGBT"(QIA) stands for "trans."

Initiation: Gnosis 2, Space 2, Empathy 2 and 2 in one of the following, Athletics, Survival, Persuasion, Expression, Crafts, Occult.
First: Heart Strings
Prerequisites: Initiation
The first training a Daughter goes through is examining the people around her, notating, guessing, and then finally intuiting how a person feels about another at a glance. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Correspondence’ cast at Instant speed and Sensory range.

You're using two reach here, but should only get one (1-dot spell at the 1-dot slot gets one reach).

If you want to play up the touch-feely and the fluff of studying, your best reach option is actually the reach that allows the Mage to understand the emotional connection. The Attainment would take a scene of interaction and a touch to activate.

Optional: Life 1
With a touch, the Daughter can learn about the physical attributes of the subject, emulating ‘Analyze Life’ cast at instant speed. Perhaps because of this Attainment, the Daughters have a reputation for being touch-friendly.

So, funny thing, this spell doesn't require sensory range, it's actually cast (or activated, for an Attainment) on you and then you study something else (hence why it's duration primary, you're the subject and it can work on multiple observed people).

Slap Advanced Duration on this one and you just know things about people at a glance (no touching involved).

Second: Red String
Prerequisites: Space 2, Empathy 3
Working on behalf of others is a time-honored tradition of the cult, who often find themselves giving guidance, or someone to vent emotion to. By spending a scene with a subject, a Daughter can move sympathetic ties (withstood by connection) between themselves and the subject. This emulates the spell ‘Borrow Threads’ cast at Advanced Duration.

I kind of like the flavor here, but keep in mind the most you're going to be able to nab (barring Archmastery) is a Medium sympathetic connection, and starting off you're going to be limited to Weak connection only.

Optional: Life 2
The Daughters have learned that the same qualities that bring them to assist others with their responsibilities, also make others have confidence in them for when they need their help returned in kind. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Lure and Repel’, cast at Advanced Duration. It can only be used on the Daughter herself, or a subject that the Daughter has spent a scene with, per the primary effect, and utilizes the Reach effect to improve social impressions.

You're over reaching, again, here; Advanced Duration or improve social impressions. If you want both (you definitely want both), bump it to the 3rd optional.

The other problem is, again, that it's both Duration Primary and Withstood, meaning you're never going to get more than Potency 3. You're also fighting for spell factors to increase Area, otherwise only people within arms reach will be affected by the effect.

(Man, Life has way too many Duration Primary but also Withstood effects.)

I don't know what would actually go well, here, honestly.

Third: Dove’s Sight
Prerequisites: Gnosis 4, One of the Legacy skill at 3, or two Legacy skills at 2.
Often, the Daughters, whether for personal attachments, or on the behalf of those who do not know their beloved’s fate, have reason to pry into the state of a person. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Scrying’, cast Sympathetically. It can only be used with ‘positive’ sympathies, most typically familial or marital bonds, withstood by the connection. Great love makes one’s need to know all the more urgent. Any surface can be used, but most traditionally, one uses a mirror. Some less scrupulous Daughters have been known to abuse this attainment to keep tabs on unwitting crushes.

This should technically cost a point of Mana for the Sympathetic range. Also, since it's Duration primary and Withstood, you're only going to be able to scry on Connected, Strong (at Space 3), or Medium (at Space 4 and 5) connections, you'll never be able to scry on a Weak sympathetic connection.

You're also missing a Reach option (you get two, since it's a 2-dot spell in a 3-dot slot). I'd recommend Advanced Duration, so it'd take a scene of prep, but let you watch someone for quite a while (a week at Space 3) and you could activate it multiple times. You could have a whole bunch of "view-screens" up at once.

The spell itself doesn't need a surface, but a binder full of mirrors, each following a different person via this attainment sounds hilarious.

Optional: Life 3
While sometimes there is nothing a Daughter can do but help a friend grieve, sometimes they see someone on the edge of death. Calling upon the dualistic love that Ares and Aphrodite held, the Daughter can save these people from the brink. This attainment emulates the spell ‘Knit’ with Reach for healing Lethal damage, cast at Instant speed. This can be used on a subject viewed through the primary effect of this attainment, or on a subject the Daughter touches, but they cannot use this attainment on themselves.

I don't think this one fits at all. Yes, Aries is a war god, and yes, Aphrodite had a prolonged affair with him, and yes Aphrodite had a war aspect since she was derived from Ishtar; but Aries is the god of wild, heedless war, accompanied by Fear, Terror, and Discord. (Also, you're overreaching, either Lethal Damage or Instant Speed.)

I'd actually put Many Faces here with Advanced Duration, it doesn't gain that much from Instant Cast; I'd also allow the granting/removing/altering of up to Potency dots in the Striking Look merit instead of or alongside moving Physical attribute dots.

Fourth: Call to Atropos
Prerequisites: Gnosis 6, Empathy 4
When all else fails, the senior members of the Legacy must step in to cut the ties of unhealthy attachments. Calling for the death of their love’s fate, the Daughter makes a symbolic call to Atropos to intervene where love has failed. This emulates ‘Cut Threads’ at Instant speed, and as per the spell, these effects are Lasting, but can be reconnected through normal interaction. It is up to the Daughters to convince the subject of the toxicity of the relationship. They can’t force you to learn.

This seems wildly out of character. First, Atropos has nothing to do with Aphrodite. Second, Aphrodite's revenge never really takes the form of making someone forever alone.

Perfect Sympathy with Advanced Duration and working on Medium Connections seems much more in line with the other Attainments.

Optional: Life 4
The Daughters have found themselves hunted many times throughout history, needing to hide their appearance, though sometimes this is used to attempt to copy one of the subjects to force an interaction, but for obvious reasons this is discouraged except as a last resort. This emulates the spell ‘Many Faces’ at Instant speed and Advanced Duration. While it is not necessary, the Daughter’s focus on beauty makes many use this to attain the Merit Striking Looks.

I'd put Control Instincts here with reach assigned to changing primary factor from Duration to Potency, Instant cast, and Advanced Duration. With a touch you're inflicting any brain-chemistry based condition you want on almost any mortal.

Fifth: Cupid’s Arrow
Prerequisites: Gnosis 8, One Legacy skill at 4, and either one more Legacy skill at 3 or two Legacy skills at 2
The ultimate mastery of Aphrodite’s principles is the creation of love. Time spent, and existing feelings are not relevant to the mistresses of the Daughters of Aphrodite. This emulates the spell ‘Create Sympathy’, used after a scene of interaction, wherein the Daughter professes the absolute nature of what they see, their words forming the arrow of myth to strike into the subject’s heart, creating a lasting Sympathy for the named subject, that can only be severed by magic. Some cruel Mistresses of the Legacy in the past have used this to punish people who killed those of the Legacy.

Eros is associated with Aphrodite. Cupid is the Roman "version" of the god and is associated with Venus (the Roman "version" of Aphrodite). I'd name this Attainment after Eros.

Optional: Life 5
One of the most tragic occurrences of birth and life in a world with conflict is that these gifts can be destroyed, or twisted, babies born with genetic defects, or injuries from war. This emulates the spell ‘Regeneration’, and unlike other uses of this spell, the effects are Lasting, but can only be used to give back the ability to reproduce, or to cancel out birth defects. A ritual of sacrifice is necessary, with the Daughter, or one close to the subject sacrificing a piece of their body to seal the effect, which cannot be itself regenerated.

Healing is still really outside Aphrodite's wheelhouse. I'm not sure what should go here instead, but Regeneration, like Knit, doesn't feel thematic at all.