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  • #31
    Originally posted by Daigotsu Max View Post
    P.329, the very last

    &quot;... but so am!&quot; should be <but so am I!&g
    It also appears like this on the DTRPG page and OPP blog post about the book.


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    • #32
      On the second page of the PDF (the inside cover, no page number), I think Vonnegut's Mother Night is misquoted. I don't have a copy to check myself, but I believe the quote is:

      "We are what we pretend [to be], so we must be careful about what we pretend to be."


      Simulacre: An Alternative Morality Stat for Prometheans
      Homebrew Athanors

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      • #33
        p. 110: "...entities in the Twilight." - the The makes it sound like a place (to me at least)
        p. 113: "...a being in the Twilight." - as above
        p. 114: "...you may reroll one failed roll made any of those Skills."
        p. 188: "...something for future Created,." - a comma was left in
        p. 249: "...as simple as and traveling someplace new..."
        pp. 249-251: lack page numbers, unlike the other spreads
        p. 305: The text about first edition games and conversions seems a little out of place.



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        • #34
          p. 256, Alchemists section: It doesn't seem like there's a mechanic for how Alchemists steal Pyros/Vitriol. Are they just intended to use the Lacuna system? Or have I missed something?



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          • #35
            P.21, within the Frankenstein section, under the "History" header, Shelley is misspelled once:

            "A few Frankensteins tell even stranger tales — Shelley herself was a redeemed Frankenstein telling her progenitor’s story, Victor Frankenstein was entirely fictitious and Shelly was the alchemist who created Adam — but the truth is lost to history."

            Between p. 22 & 23: "Extempore: Don’t give me that bullshit. There’s a way for all of us. Just keep on kicking."
            This text should be in the box on page 22 but is kind of "hidden" behind the Galatea header on page 23.
            Last edited by Viradu; 08-04-2016, 07:32 PM.

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            • #36
              pg. 31 "...give them the strength to perform incredible feats..." should be "gives them"

              pg. 32 "Spirits don't usually know human rules, and even then, they don't follow them." I think there should be more with "even then." Perhaps "and even when they do, they don't follow them."

              pg. 34 "He has a certain intensity that gives others pause, and forget their snide comments." I think it should be something more like "and makes them forget their snide comments."

              pg. 36 Mythology note: Talos didn't guard the island of Europa. There is no island of Europa. Talos guarded Zeus's lover Europa on the island of Crete.

              pg. 37 Ivan's paragraph generally uses male pronouns and possessives, but there is one "herself" and one "her."

              pg. 37 "Unfleshed are most likely to fall into a violent Torment when they are threatened, frightened, for frustrated." Should be "or frustrated."

              pg. 37 "the Unfleshed becomes confused and frustrated..." There is an extra space before "frustrated."

              pg. 37 Bestowment The Soul is in the Software: shouldn't it be The Soul Is In The Software?

              pg. 40 "When she finishes her sandwich she gropes for his hand." There should be a comma between "sandwich" and "she."

              pg. 60 There is extra leading before "the darkness without being swallowed up in it."

              pg. 62 "She feels an emptiness and a multitude she cannot lay her mind's eye on..." A multitude of what?

              pg. 63 "Sometimes the reason is beyond our control but..." There should be a comma between "control" and "but."

              pg. 65 "It was an uncommon approach for a marriage counselor but..." There should be a comma between "counselor" and "but."

              pg. 80 The period after "(p. 188)." looks purple instead of black.

              pg. 81 "The student must examine his view on the world, the road he has traveled so far and the goal he is working towards." There should be a comma between "far" and "and."

              pg. 81 "One Promethean might like to study, watch and wait..." There should be a comma between "watch" and "and."

              pg. 82 "Every Promethean must pass these benchmarks and she is..." There should be a comma between "benchmarks" and "and."

              pg. 82 "They deal with unanswered questions, fears and doubts..." There should be a comma between "fears" and "and"

              pg. 82 "universal, prescribed or instinctive" There should be a comma between "prescribed" and "or."

              pg. 84 "...17 CE and in 1980 CE" There should be a comma between "CE" and "and."

              pg. 84 "...than before; not unlike the Promethean." Should that semi-colon be a comma?

              pg. 87 "manifest more savagely, and exacerbates his Torment." That comma should be deleted.

              pg. 89 "enhanced power, intelligence and self-awareness" There should be a comma between "intelligence" and "and."

              pg. 90 "wreck buildings, toss people like rag dolls and burn forests to the ground" There should be a comma between "dolls" and "and."

              pg. 91 "Torment, Disquiet and even Wastelands" There should be a comma between "Disquiet" and "and."

              pg. 91 "A handful of Prometheans has deliberately tried..." Replace "has" with "have."

              pg. 92 "Whether the God-Machine appreciates this or would rather see its younger self discarded is unknown." The Principle is the OLDER self, not the younger.

              pg. 92 "...mortal alchemists, poets and his own experiences." There should be a comma between "poets" and "and."

              pg. 94 "A Jovian Athanor might call Pandorans, drain Pyros, or cause Torment, Disquiet or even Wastelands." There should be a comma between "Disquiet" and "or."

              pg. 94 "Few Prometheans uncover the secret of creating a Firestorm Catalyst and the process seems to involve great quantities of Pyros." There should be a comma between "Catalyst" and "the."

              pg. 94 "When a Promethean creates a Pilgrimage Marker, she distills some of her own journey, experiences and hopes into the Athanor." There should be a comma between "experiences" and "and."

              pg. 94 "A Refinement Mentor directly impresses a Refinement upon the student’s alchemical make-up, rather than working through words (either spoken or on paper) which must then be understood, learned and internalized." There should be a comma between "learned" and "and."

              pg. 95 "A Sanctuary is always tied to a fixed location and while it appears to shield its Azothic call from Pandorans, that does not prevent a clever
              Pandoran from finding out about it and lying in wait for new arrivals." There should be a comma between "location" and "and."

              pg. 95 "When a Promethean chooses to embrace New Dawn, the Azoth inside him becomes a raging inferno that consumes all Torment, Disquiet, Transmutations and Pyros." There should be a comma between "Transmutations" and "and."

              pg. 95 "This is where any ties to his Promethean existence end, for he is no longer Created, but human, with all the frailty and beauty that entails." I don't think the comma between "Created" and "but" is necessary.

              pg. 106 "Torment is the part a Promethean’s personality that distances..." There should be an "of" between "part" and "a."

              pg. 108 It should be "Unearthly Mien" instead of "Unearthly Mein."

              pg. 110 "The Soul is in the Software" looks weird. "The Soul Is In The Software" looks better.

              pg. 117 "Doing so always reveals a Promethean titan’s feet of clay, however, either by rending the fragile physical alchemy that hides her disfigurements, or by causing a potent supernatural Condition to dog their steps." If you said her first, you should also say "her steps" instead of "their steps."

              pg. 118 The paragraph starting "Refinements cause physical changes..." should be indented.

              pg. 173 "Symptoms start as confusion and annoyance, but can advance to paranoia, confusion, and eventually a contagious stage, where the victim forms an angry mob to hunt the Promethean down like an animal." I don't think the comma between "stage" and "where" is necessary.

              pg. 174 "Unlike Disquiet, this phenomenon takes its toll on the environment, instead of directly affecting people." I don't think the comma between "environment" and "instead" is necessary.

              pg. 174 "The Wasteland is a force of entropy, it breaks down structure, life, and patterns in its midst." I think the comma between "entropy" and "it" should be a semi-colon.

              pg. 174 "This isn’t a palpable sickness, this isn’t a plague that can be cured." Either make the comma a semi-colon, or make these two separate sentences, or delete the comma and change it to "This isn't a palpable sickness or a plague that can be cured."

              pg. 174 "A careful Promethean can stay in one area, if she’s careful." Delete the first "careful."

              pg. 174 "(see Festering, below)" should be purple?

              pg. 184 "Others create a new Promethean, either out of a desire to experience parenthood, or the belief that only by creating something to take her place can she ever transcend to a new state." I don't think the comma between "parenthood" and "or" is necessary, though I'm not totally sure.

              pg. 184 "As an operation, projectio involves passing from dead stuff..." Italicize "projectio."

              pg. 186 "...the player can choose whether her character remembers her experiences, or remembers her human
              life." I don't think the comma between "experiences" and "or" is necessary.

              Last edited by Anaximander; 08-05-2016, 01:05 AM.

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              • #37
                On page 91 the followers of Mercurius are referred to as Ophidians, but their entry establishes their nickname as Savants. Said nickname is also missing at the top of their entry, as well.

                Also not sure if it's been mention, but the Frankenstein appear to be missing an opinion on Extempore.

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                • #38
                  Page 48, "Dysphoria is not an uncommon malady among the Created, stitched together according to another’s design, another’s will." Should this be dysmorphia instead of dysphoria? The refinement in general seems more focused on body image than existential issues.


                  Going by Willow now, or Wil for short. She/Her/Hers.

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                  • #39
                    Originally posted by pg.83
                    The
                    Promethean’s absence causes the Wasteland, if it hasn’t already
                    progressed too far, to stagnate and remain as it is, growing neither
                    smaller nor larger unless another Created inadvertently fuels it.
                    This contradicts the rules for fading wastelands on pg.176.

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                    • #40
                      P. 9 ("Alice's Ramble"): First paragraph, second line: "I learned quick what happened if spoke up..." Should be "if *I* spoke up"

                      P. 20: First column, last paragraph: "stich" should be "stitch"

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                      • #41
                        p. 81: "This Refinement deal with the same principles as..."
                        p. 118: "With each new Role mastered within a Refinement, the player may select another Alembic each Transmutation..." - missing a from, I think.
                        p. 119, Fortification: "Successes improve Durability, then Structure." - It doesn't say how you determine when the successes are supposed to rollover onto Structure, unless I'm missing something.
                        Bookmarks / Table Contents, p. 6: The Centimani entry is sorted under Pandorans
                        p. 247: "The con, of course, it never lasts."
                        p. 248: "...and her behavior, likewise is feminine." - should be a comma after likewise
                        p. 248: "...Disruption (as the Solvent Distillation) Lordship" - should be a comma after the closing parenthesis
                        Last edited by Yossarian; 08-05-2016, 09:57 PM.



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                        • #42
                          pg. 236 "It presented itself when one of its legs stepped wrong, and too much of it pressed to the ground." I don't think the comma between "wrong" and "and" is necessary.

                          pg. 239 "A Pandoran in chrysalis might adopt a shape of marble, stone or wood..." There should be a comma between "stone" and "or."

                          pg. 239 "...resulting in limbs sprouting from bellies, gnashing maws on hands, joints that bent backwards and a myriad of other deformities." It should either be "joints that bend backwards" or "joints bent backwards." There should be a comma between "backwards" and "and."

                          pg. 240 "...scare any Promethean with measure of common sense." There should be a word between "with" and "measure."

                          pg. 241 "...be it in the face of the statue, shadows cast by the wall or a peculiar shape in the wood." There should be a comma between "wall" and "or."

                          pg. 241 "The object shatters and the creature springs forth in a snarling tangle of claws and teeth." There should be a comma between "shatters" and "and."

                          pg. 241 "By comparison though, it immediately ends when the Pandoran departs the scene." There should be a comma between "comparison" and "though."

                          pg. 241 "Fortunately, the nature of Flux is not coherent enough to maintain a praecipitatus for long and the monstrosity is usually short-lived." There should be a comma between "long" and "and."

                          pg. 242 "Cottus the Furious: A Praecipitatus..." "Praecipitatus" should not be capitalized.

                          pg. 242 "Cygnes the Cunning" "Cygnes" means "swan" in French; you mean the Hecatonkhire "Gyges."

                          pg. 243 "...which it concocts after stalking and observing its prey, and learning his weaknesses." I don't think the comma between "prey" and "and" is necessary.

                          pg. 246 "The Calavera’s dormant form is considered a work of art in its field and it has traveled most of Mexico and the US border states as a museum exhibit." There should be a comma between "field" and "and."

                          pg. 246 "Struggling on the last league of her Pilgrimage..." Should "league" be "leg"? League works, though.

                          pg. 247 "In Dormancy, Dollface looks like a Victorian doll with a lovely sculpted face, short blonde curls (made of real human hair) and a tiny gentleman’s suit." There should be a comma between ")" and "and."

                          pg. 247 "The con, of course, it never lasts." Delete "it."

                          pg. 249 "A Promethean can find peace in accepting her own nature, in not having to fight to become something else and being able to stop running from the Pandorans at her heels." There should be a comma between "else" and "and."

                          pg. 251 "He is no idealist, his interest is purely practical." The comma should be a semi-colon.

                          pg. 255 "Early in his existence, he witnessed a young boy and his dog playing and the unconditional love that the animal showed its owner stuck with him." There should be a comma between "playing" and "and."

                          pg. 255 "The Huntsman once represented the Byronic ideal of a man: curly dark hair, strong features, and athletic." To maintain parallelism, something should be added to "athletic," like "body" or "build."

                          pg. 255 "The Scholar spent many long years walking the Pilgrimage and she was close to success, very close, but in the end she failed." There should be a comma between "Pilgrimage" and "and."

                          pg. 257 "...lost sight of love, fellowship and the value of mundane accomplishment." There should be a comma between "fellowship" and "and."

                          pg. 260 Shouldn't there be a period after Amalgama Ltd?

                          pg. 261 "Having spent years among the sick and the mad and turned their backs the very idea of balance,..." I think a comma should be placed between "mad" and "and," and "turned" changed to "having turned" or "turning."

                          pg. 263 "The surgery to remove her breast and part of her jaw left her lopsided and scarred and after the chemotherapy; her hair grew..." The semi-colon should be moved to between "scarred" and "and," and a comma should be put in its place between "chemotherapy" and "her." Or, split the sentences.

                          pg. 263 "She isn’t afraid of mortality, she wants immortality. She isn’t afraid of sickness; she wants power." The comma between "mortality" and "she" should be changed to a semi-colon to match the second sentence.

                          pg. 268 "Most of the time, the Messengers appear as a humans or animals." Delete "a."

                          pg. 269 "One aspect of qashmallim Missions remains constant across every encounter; the Scintillating Flames work to a strict timetable." The semi-colon should be a colon.

                          pg. 269 "Some Savants claim that qashmallim aren’t strictly speaking sapient; that any qashmal appearing able..." The semi-colon should be a comma.

                          pg. 269 "...it assesses every development and situation as benefit or hindrance to that Mission, and ignores irrelevancies." I don't think the comma is necessary.

                          pg. 269 It should be "fulfill," not "fulfil."

                          pg. 269 "These agents of the Principle take on tangible form to apply their might against a subject, or use powerful Numina to inflict horrors on a victim." I don't think the comma is necessary.

                          pg. 270 "...which correspond to the two forms of Pyros; Elpis and Flux." The semi-colon should be a colon.

                          pg. 270 "and as a consequence of their Missions they often display powers that provoke religious awe or revelation." There should be a comma between "Missions" and "they."

                          pg. 270 "Elpidos punish transgressors but don’t have any sense of justice." There should be a comma between "transgressors" and "but."

                          pg. 270 "(that is, almost everyone that isn’t a Promethean,)" The comma should be outside the parenthesis.

                          pg. 270 "They appear, usually in the guise of human beings, carry out their Missions quietly and vanish back into the Pyros." There should be a comma between "quietly" and "and."

                          pg. 270 "Qashmallim are not Supernal Entities (they’re born of this world’s Pyros, not the Supernal Realms of platonic forms) and they aren’t the servant-slaves of the God-Machine." Should platonic be capitalized? There should be a comma between ")" and "and."

                          pg. 272 "The following example Flames show Missions of the different Choirs and Orders, and how qashmallim..." I don't think the comma is necessary.

                          pg. 273 "Every few weeks she follows the river down..." There should be a comma after "weeks."

                          pg. 273 "This one is a survey team; geologists, meteorologists, and the people needed to keep them alive on the Southern ice." The semi-colon should be a colon.


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                          • #43
                            Pg. 256 The Scholar has the Perfected Bezoars dread power, which is not listed anywhere.

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                            • #44
                              Pg. 99 - Chapter Three opening - " You’ve done the research. Now it’s time to get to work. The body’s been assembled."

                              Needless triple space between 'Now' and 'it's'.

                              Pg. 168 - Azoth section - 'Maximum Azoth/Azoth Per Turn'

                              It's clearly should be Pyros instead of Azoth, as Pyros is 'Fuel Stat' of Promethean.

                              Pg. 168 - Pyros section - "Shock Absorption: By spending a point of Pyros when taking damage'

                              Needless triple space between 'Absorption' and 'By'.

                              Pg. 171 - What Torment Is Like - Humors section

                              In Chapter One, Humors of Linages are defined as literal fluids ( Blood, Bile, Ephemera, etc. ). But in this section the are personalities, like choleric or melancholic. Some clarification is needed, as 'Humor-Moods' table of 1E is not in 2E corebook and it's sounds a bit confusing if not known the context.

                              Pg. 173 - Disquiet Triggers - ' In this roll, failure is advantageous for the player. As such, she cannot voluntarily acquire a dramatic failure for a Beat. '

                              I needed to reread this section literally three times to understand that it talks about roll from Promethean stand point. Much clear would be changing 'player' to 'Promethean' or 'Created' in this sentence.
                              Last edited by wyrdhamster; 08-06-2016, 10:38 AM.


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                              • #45
                                A tad pedantic, but the words humor and humour are NOT really interchangeable in this book. I mean, there's only ONE case of the former used to describe a penchant for wit, but still it's important enough to have a spelling difference, isn't it?

                                Anyway, here's the list of where I found changes needed for this issue:

                                p 20, last full para of second column, ‘their own unbalanced humors’
                                p 22, last para of first column, ‘imbalanced humors make’
                                p 22, second para of second column, ‘of her humors is to’
                                p 22, second para of second column, ‘with her humors raging’
                                p 24, last para of first column, ‘Humor: Blood.’
                                p 24, last para of first column, ‘Galateid’s humor gives’
                                p 24, last para of first column, ‘imbalanced humors make’
                                p 24, third full para of second column, ‘in her humors’
                                p 29, last full para of first column, ‘their imbalanced humors’
                                p 31, fourth full para of first column, ‘Humor: Black Bile.’

                                …But NOT p 32, third para of second column!

                                p 37, fourth full para of first column, ‘Humor: Oil.’
                                p 37, fourth full para of first column, ‘Their humor is’
                                p 37, last full para of second column (above Bestowment), ‘their humors slide’
                                p 39, second full para of first column, ‘her humors has no choice’
                                p 39, last para of second column, ‘imbalanced humors give’
                                p 40, fourth full para of first column, ‘Humor: Any.’
                                p 40, fourth full para of first column, ‘ “traditional” humors’
                                …same, ‘unearthly humor’
                                …same, ‘artificial humor’
                                p 40, fourth full para of first column, ‘humor at character creation’
                                p 40, fifth full para of first column, ‘Sharing a humor’
                                p 40, fifth full para of first column, ‘principles of her humor’
                                p 40, fifth full para of first column, ‘sanguine humor’
                                p 40, first para of second column, ‘humor, she almost’
                                …same, ‘with the same humor.’
                                p 40, first para of second column, ‘her sanguine humor’
                                p 40, first para of second column, ‘with ectoplasmic humor’
                                p 40, third para of second column, ‘entirely new humors’
                                p 40, third para of second column, ‘Every humor should’
                                p 40, third para of second column, ‘Consider the humors described’
                                …same, ‘the humor of “salt” ’
                                p 125, under We Are As One in first column, ‘all of their humors’
                                p 130, under Human Flesh in first column, ‘of the sanguine humor’
                                p 147, first para of second column, ‘affinity for the humors’
                                p 148, second para of second column, ‘subject’s sanguine humor’
                                p 149, first para under Eris in first column, ‘the phlegmatic humor’
                                p 150, first para under Penthos in first column, ‘subject’s melancholic humor’
                                p 154, last para under Humour Electrolysis in first column, ‘much of her humor’
                                p 257, last para of sidebar The Great Work in second column, ‘for their humors’
                                p 258, last para of sidebar Strange Alchemies in second column, ‘for their humors’
                                p 258, last para of second column, ‘harvest their humors’
                                p 259, last full para of first column, ‘for their humors’
                                p 259, last full para of first column, ‘extract their humors’
                                p 261, fourth para of first column, ‘dangerously imbalanced humors’
                                p 261, fifth para of first column, ‘in their humors and tissues’


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