Feedback for a Scenario inspired by Doctor Who "The Return"

[Crowley]

I loved the whole "War on Horizon" event, the 7 day battle between the original council, the nephandi, the marauders, the technocracy and the Hollow Ones.

My game is set years after the battle of 99' (19 years exact)

i been thinking a lot on how horrible must the war been and i can't stop thinking of Doctor Who's "Final Timewar."

currently my players are meeting vetvets from the war and slowly trying to create a new and better council of nine (probably a council of ten) but with Concordia Gone and the original planets vanished its going to be a hard task...


Thing is, some survivors of the war are seeing the events unfoldind and they know that The War ISNT Over.. its been Time Locked, a perpetual 7 day war. a battle where those who died are bought back to life due to a time paradox, forced to live and die over and over again (driving them mad).

The Conservationists are trying to break the Timelock and bring the old council back (That includes EVERYTHING THAT WAS SEALED ON THAT BATTLEFIELD). And now the survivors of the original council want to break the sphere of time, destroy time itself as a retaliation against the universe for the betrayal and the seven day's of hell..Believing that they must inherit the universe and ascend/trascend as " creatures of conciousness alone - free of these bodies, free of time, and cause and effect - while creation itself ceases to be! "

Any thoughts on that general idea? of the old vs new, of the horrors and nightmares trying to come back to earth?.

Also,since i been watching too much doctor who, im trying to imitate the speech of the final day's of the war but involving mages. any ideas to replace certain names and factions in this speech for the ones in mage the ascension..
"You weren't there, in the final days of the War. You never saw what was born. But if the Time Lock's broken, then everything's coming through. Not just the Daleks, but the Skaro Degradations, the Horde of Travesties, the Nightmare Child, the Could-Have-Been-King with his army of Meanwhiles and Neverweres; the War turned into Hell! And that's what you've opened, right above the Earth! Hell is descending!"

im thinking "You weren't there, in the final days of the War. You never saw what was born. But if the Time Lock's broken, then everything's coming through. Not just the Marauder, but the Nephandi Degradations, the Horde of Abominations, the hellfire of Concordia, the Void Engineers with their armies of Hitmarks and Psicoperatives; the War turned into Hell! And that's what you've opened, right above the Earth! Hell is descending!

[Otto D'Fey]

I loved the whole "War on Horizon" event, the 7 day battle between the original council, the nephandi, the marauders, the technocracy and the Hollow Ones.

My game is set years after the battle of 99' (19 years exact)

i been thinking a lot on how horrible must the war been and i can't stop thinking of Doctor Who's "Final Timewar."

currently my players are meeting vetvets from the war and slowly trying to create a new and better council of nine (probably a council of ten) but with Concordia Gone and the original planets vanished its going to be a hard task...

Thing is, some survivors of the war are seeing the events unfoldind and they know that The War ISNT Over.. its been Time Locked, a perpetual 7 day war. a battle where those who died are bought back to life due to a time paradox, forced to live and die over and over again (driving them mad).

Also a Doctor Who fan, and I think there are some easy parallels to be drawn between the Timewar and Horizon. Timelocking it is a cool idea. It sounds like the mages--at least some of them--are cognizant of the Time Lock, and that is driving them mad. But they can't change their actions? You might consider how to address that inconsistency. Hell, perhaps many Time masters are trying to change what happened, if not individually then with the war itself, and there's a real risk that one of them will be able to break the Time Lock, or make it so the lock couldn't have been enacted in the first place! That would add another level of suspense to what is unfolding.

The Conservationists are trying to break the Timelock and bring the old council back (That includes EVERYTHING THAT WAS SEALED ON THAT BATTLEFIELD). And now the survivors of the original council want to break the sphere of time, destroy time itself as a retaliation against the universe for the betrayal and the seven day's of hell..Believing that they must inherit the universe and ascend/trascend as " creatures of conciousness alone - free of these bodies, free of time, and cause and effect - while creation itself ceases to be! "

Any thoughts on that general idea? of the old vs new, of the horrors and nightmares trying to come back to earth?.

One deep parallel between the Time Lords and the Archmages is their hubris. The options you describe above are crazeeee, but just the sort of thing overconfident archmasters would dream up, damn the consequences ("The worthy, such as ourselves, shall Ascend as beings of limitless power and ingenuity. Who better to rebuild a better Creation that such as us? Simply place your trust in our hands....while we still have them. Muahahaha!").

Also,since i been watching too much doctor who, im trying to imitate the speech of the final day's of the war but involving mages. any ideas to replace certain names and factions in this speech for the ones in mage the ascension..
"You weren't there, in the final days of the War. You never saw what was born. But if the Time Lock's broken, then

everything's coming through. Not just the Daleks, but the Skaro Degradations, the Horde of Travesties, the Nightmare Child, the Could-Have-Been-King with his army of Meanwhiles and Neverweres; the War turned into Hell! And that's what you've opened, right above the Earth! [I]Hell is descending!"

Partially incorrect. You cannot watch too much Doctor Who. You can only watch too much of the wrong episodes. One of the most notable aspects of that speech is the inclusion of cryptic references to beings we know nothing about and which are not revealed at all. Who was that Nightmare Child anyway? An army of Meanwhiles? I'd come up with a couple oddities. Yes, there were Nephandi, but what horrible things did they bring with them? Give a name to one. Marauders are so individualistic that describing them en masse doesn't do justice to their idiosyncrasies and varying goals. Give a couple of them names, perhaps coupled with some significant effect they have ("...and the Waking Nightmare, who only grows more powerful with every new iteration of the Time Locked war..."

Lastly, at least a few other warring mages probably aren't interested in breaking time or wrecking the universe. They'd be at odds with the surviving council but would have their own agenda(s).

And second to last (it's a time war, I can do this), make sure your characters have significant ways to affect this high-powered plot, rather than being bystanders to unfolding events. Good luck!

[BlueWinds]

That sounds pretty neat. I'll second Otto D'Fey suggest that there be plenty of ways for the PCs it interact with events - not just trying to stop it (if that's what they're up to), but also maybe attempting to rescue certain people from inside without opening the gates all the way. Also, what's the fall-back plan if they fail? Because, you know, unless it's the climax of the campaign, you should know what happens if they just don't stop things.

Random thought - perhaps the fallback is that the Technocracy's going to zorch the whole thing with Copernicus Research Base's star-laser. This'll have all sorts of nasty consequences for the Umbral Realms. While the Technos are prepared to call that fallout an acceptable price for holding back the horde of ...stuff, the PCs think they can stop things more cleanly? Gives the players more levers to pull on / people to interact with beyond 'stop the can of sealed evil.'

My take on the speech:

"You weren't there, in the final days of the War. You never saw what was born. But if the Time Seal's broken, then everything's coming through. Not just the Nephrandi, but the Archmages gone mad, their horde of Willwraiths, Hitmark 17, the Could-Have-Been-King with his army of Neversprites and and Ever-mores; the War turned into Hell! And that's what you've opened, right above the Earth! Hell is descending!"